Luck and a bit of support can go a long way it seems and when people do get the support they need they really appreciate it! This DM is from a mother who accessed one of my Breastfeeding Support Packages:

"Re. the top up trap...one of the midwives suggested a top up to me on the second day...had I not spoken to you for our intro chat, I wouldn't have been aware of it and I would have likely accepted. However because we had spoken and you had made me aware of some of these pitfalls, I felt confident to say I didn't want to do a top up and that I would plough on with exclusively breastfeeding. On one of my nights in the ward after giving birth I noticed that I was the only women (out of 7 in the ward) that wasn't putting in an order for a formula for the night."

Unfortunately, the positive experiences above in the image were in the minority of those sent to me, but we also have to remember that people are more likely to share challenging experiences than positive or easy ones. I'd also like to point out that this post isn't about demonising midwives, rather exploring the problems with the Irish Maternity system that means that women often do not get the support they need when it comes to breastfeeding. 

Lets look at Sarah's experience:

"Offered formula in the delivery suite as baby wouldn't latch. It was clearly the end of her shift, she was tired and I don’t blame her in the slightest but why spend all the time and effort convincing us to breastfeed antenatally then be met with formula at the very first hurdle. I refused btw and spent the whole night hand expressing into a syringe"

When I initially wrote this blog in 2022 being offered formula in the delivery suite wasn't actually all that common but and was quite shocking as there is absolutely no need at this stage. But unfortunately since its original publication I am seeing this happen more and more. While it's beneficial if baby has their first breastfeed in the first hour after birth it is not a necessity so there was no need for supplementation and even if there was Sarah should of been encouraged to express colostrum instead, thankfully she knew to do this herself.

In this next story Michelle had three different challenging experiences, and not only in the postnatal ward. The positive outcome of this story is that due to her experiences she went on to train to be a volunteer breastfeeding counsellor and to support women in her community.

"Being told repeatedly that the latch looks fine even though I was crying with the pain for the whole duration of each feed. This was on my first and second babies.
Being told that I had got it wrong with the whole nose to nipple thing, and that my nipple should be at baby's bottom lip.
My third was a home birth but had feeding issues again. I remember going to the lactation clinic at the hospital and asking them to check my baby for tongue tie but being fobbed off and leaving in tears (she was my third baby and I was a trainee BFC and I knew she had a TT!). I got an IBCLC out to the house then who confirmed a very restrictive tie, which we got released.

Oh and being in the baby clinic with my 4 week old baby who roared in pain all day every day and wasn't doing enough dirty nappies. I asked to see an IBCLC but was told they were in meetings all day. I was given an Rx for omeprazole, which I knew wasn't necessary, and told that everything is fine."

I'm not sure what the above experiences say to you but to me it sounds like overstretched midwives and unsupported mothers. We have to ask how is this allowed to continue? It's not fair on the staff, many of the mothers expressed understanding about this but it should never be that a mother is afraid to ask for help because the people who are supposed to be there to help them are too busy.

Below is Jane's story, I did a private antenatal class with Jane & her husband while pregnant which included breastfeeding information. Jane's story gives us a myriad of different experiences and shows how individual midwives do count and how their support (or not) can leave a lasting impression.

"Hey Niamh hope you’re well!
I said I’d share my PP BF experience!
Initially in the delivery suit the midwife was so helpful, baby latched with some of my help but she was pretty good. The midwife returned and was so celebratory that as A FTM I had the knowledge to try it myself and she gave me extra tips. She was also super encouraging with skin to skin etc basically everything.
Then hospital was busy so I wasn't brought to a postnatal ward, I was brought to a gynae recovery ward. It was Friday night at 2am, one week before Christmas and covid was playing havoc.
Sadly, at this point I didn’t have a great experience. My husband was gone home and I was shattered after a 2 day induction and long labour!
The nurse, as I sussed very quickly didn’t have much knowledge of BF, she told me my baby was starving, I was being selfish, I wouldn’t be let home within 48 hours if the baby didn’t have food and lost weight.. it was not what I expected

I rang my husband and he was cool and reassured me. I sat holding my baby warm and close to my body, she fed a little and slept and fed and slept.. sometimes she cried!
The nurse returned and said I’d need to give her formula as my ‘milk hadn’t come in’ … I asked her how she knew that? She left.
Morning came and my husband was back, I felt braver with him supporting me as I was so tired.
That day was alright, nobody really said or did much, but def no support.
That night, a midwife was on. My baby was howling crying and I was wrecked. She said if I gave the baby formula we would both sleep.. now, here is where I get upset. She referenced my epilepsy, which is relevant when sleep deprived but there was no room to support and help me, it just scared the life out of me. She pushed the formula. I had harvested colostrum and I asked her to bring it from the fridge, she was a bit dismissive. You’ll never guess what..

I fed the baby and topped her up with colostrum of my own!
I was actually really proud 😂
We both got some sleep and I felt better after that!

The final midwife I met was amazing. She was an IBCLC and was super helpful. I can never thank her enough because I checked out that day feeling so supported and confident!! Super experience!
I do think I was lucky as I had learned before had by doing classes with you and reading and just taking in information, but as you can see it’s a super mixed bag of positive and negative.
I also felt very strongly about giving myself, my baby and my body a chance to bf but I could see if a person wasn’t, they would have left with formula where maybe they would have been happier bf!

It’s when I look back I can see it clearer, at the time it’s all so much to take in!"

If all midwives had the knowledge, bandwidth and empathy of the first and last that Jane met I would meet a lot less distressed mothers when they get home and realise they don't know how to keep going with a mix of formula and breastfeeding and that they can't cope with the level of work that doing both at the same time brings. It's time that mothers were able to count on appropriate support for breastfeeding in hospital and not just lip service antenatally.

You can download my free handout for tips around breastfeeding in hospital here 

Or if you'd like to check out my low cost Breastfeeding in Hospital Mini-Course which also  includes my entire breastfeeding handout library you can find it here